And This is Why I’ll Never Do Laundry Again

never-doing-laundry-againOn laundry day last week, I headed out to my garage (aka laundry room), and began dutifully stuffing things into the washing machine. Suddenly I caught a flash of movement out of the corner of my eye. I thought it was either my imagination or a mouse…both of which I can deal with. But to my horror as I turned my head to get a clearer look, I saw that it was not a mouse, or my usual paranoia…but a snake! A SNAKE! In my garage, no more than 2 feet from where I was standing! Worse yet, I’m pretty sure that it slithered out from under the washer (probably when it heard me open the garage door). I’m now certain that it lives under there with a nest-full of slithering baby snakes, and comes out to feed on unsuspecting toes, ankles, and the occasional fingertip or two. Obviously, I’m not up for becoming snake-bait, so I see three solutions before me:

  1. Declare a permanent end to laundry duty and see if I can pretend that we’re just taking the “grunge” look to a whole new level.
  2. Buy fishing waders or a hazmat suit so as to properly protect my legs and feet from imminent snake attack.
  3. Figure out some way to get the snake to leave…

I’m hoping you all might have some advice on how to implement option #3. Do they even make snake traps (I’m having a hard time visualizing what that would look like)? How would one even encourage a snake to venture into it? Somehow I don’t think that snakes are as gullible as mice with the ol’ cheese bait trick. I really don’t want to kill the thing…just encourage it to go far far away from me. Do any of you have experience with reptile wrangling? If so, this is your time to shine!

Snake image from BioDiv Library

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  1. Chandre / / Reply

    I have no advice other than calling the zoo to come out and look. I am sure that I would have done the silent scream of pure terror if I had been you.

    • Ez
      Ez / / Reply

      Silent scream of terror it right! So so scary! Thanks for the zoo tip. If I can’t find an animal control service nearby I might have to go that route. There is a small zoo in a neighboring town. At the very least, they might know who else I could call, right?! xo

  2. Eros / / Reply

    Try to find a local kid to move them for you! When I was a kid I would have to pick up and move tons of neighborhood snakes to the nearby creek-and sometimes I still do. Just make sure they’re harmless ones first, I guess.

  3. missy / / Reply

    I have a couple of snakes living in the garden. I see them here and there but the best was when last year I was picking pickling cucumbers aka pickles and there was a baby snake curled up on one of the vines. I’m not afraid of them but they do startle me when I’m not expecting it. I read up and found out that our snakes are no threat and actually help the garden so they can live among-st the harvest.

    Ropel 4lb Snake Repellent:

    Keeps snakes away from lawns, gardens, house perimeters, patios, sheds and more
    Can be used around pets
    Non-lethal barrier derived from plant oils

    • Ez
      Ez / / Reply

      I’m definitely looking into that repellent to deter future snake visitors. Thanks for the recommendation! One time while gardening (at another house a long time ago) I accidentally grabbed a snake along with the weeds that I was yanking up. I never weeded that yard again (fortunately we moved shortly thereafter)!

  4. Jennifer / / Reply

    Oh my! That sounds scary! Do you remember that episode of the Cosby show with the snake in the basement? I think they caught it in a pillowcase. If watching old sitcoms for tips doesn’t work, I’d call animal or pest control!

    • Ez
      Ez / / Reply

      Sadly I wasn’t allowed to watch much tv as a kid, so I don’t know the Cosby reference…but catching a snake in a pillowcase sounds terrifying (insert wide-eyed emoticon here)! Eek!
      We live in such a tiny town that I’m not sure if there is an animal control unit (we don’t even have any traffic lights), but I’m definitely going to look into it. Thanks!! xo

  5. San / / Reply

    Good god. I am not going to be of much help. I am just as frightened (from afar) as you are.

  6. Jenna / / Reply

    You could always call Animal Control to come remove it!

  7. Stacia / / Reply

    I’m with one of the earlier commentators, try calling the zoo to see if they want it or if they can recommend someone to come get it or a method for catching it. I’m sure that they have experience wrangling snakes. Right? Good luck!

  8. Leslie / / Reply

    No advice, just sympathy – my laundry room is also in my garage, and now I am kind of terrified too!

  9. SuzyMcQ / / Reply

    Snake repellants don’t work, sorry. I would get someone to move your washer and dryer to see if there is anything under there, then I would put some mouse traps out, as usually, at least here on the East Coast where I live, snakes only come into dwellings when there is something to eat, that is, mice. I’m not sure if the snake/s are living under your washer/dryer, but you may have to move things around in your garage to find it/them. Then, after you do, seal up all holes where they could have entered and don’t leave your garage door open for extended periods of time.

    Can you tell this is coming from someone who once found a snake in her house? The former owner hadn’t sealed up some vents, but they are sealed tightly now!

  10. Tang / / Reply

    I think I would just die. I’m terrified of snakes! I don’t think I would be able to sleep at night if that happened to me!

  11. Maria @ A bookworm's life / / Reply

    Oh my goodness! I thought I had a traumatic laundry experience when a big scary spider came out of the tumble dryer as I was pulling clothes out, but this is pure nightmare material. I am terrified of snakes and Unfortunately I don’t have any advice for you; I hope your snake situation gets sorted out soon!

  12. Laura Gaskill / / Reply

    Oh no! I would have totally freaked out! Definitely call animal control — they should be able to come get it for you. Good luck Ez!!!

  13. Donna / / Reply

    Since I have an honest to goodness phobia of snakes, I am fairly certain that I would have literally died of terror….

    My husband tells me they’re good to have around as they eat the mice but…. I need for them to never be seen…. EVER!!!!

  14. Katie / / Reply

    That is my worst fear!!

    I’ve heard that rolling some moth balls around where snakes may be present can make them go away. So maybe just roll some underneath the dryer and after it’s left, by any holes it may have crawled into. Good luc!

  15. Claire / / Reply

    My husband and I both agree that you should just set fire to the garage and walk away. Collect insurance money and start fresh.

    • Ez
      Ez / / Reply

      This solution is starting to sound more and more tempting by the moment!

  16. lisa :: the red thread / / Reply

    Nooooooo! I’m sorry I have no advice. My (ex)MIL found a snake under the toilet seat last summer. She lifted the seat up (after she’d been sitting on it!) because she glimpsed something there and a looong snake was curled around and around underneath it. They live on a farm here in Australia so she is somewhat used to snakes… but not in the house.
    Use a laundromat!

    • Ez
      Ez / / Reply

      I grew up having nightmares about snakes slithering out of toilets, so your story terrifies the you-know-what out of me! I’m so glad your ex MIL wasn’t bitten! There are so many ways that story could have gone terribly wrong…can you imagine! Eek!

  17. Rebecca Elliott / / Reply

    When I was in high school we used to live in this house in the middle of nowhere. I can remember a few times where we found rattle snakes curled up on the closet floor. Since it’s illegal to kill a diamondback in North Carolina, we made quite a few calls to our local police station.

    • Ez
      Ez / / Reply

      Oh my goodness…I would absolutely die from a scare like that! I caught a glimpse of the tail of the snake in our garage, and unless it was an abnormally large baby, I don’t think ours is rattler. I guess I can take small comfort in that?

  18. Lynne / / Reply

    Is this a true story? Yikes! I currently have some mice I’m in denial about, but a snake takes things to a whole new level!

    • Ez
      Ez / / Reply

      I really wish it wasn’t true…but unfortunately it is! I haven’t seen the snake since the first sighting last week, but the garage is so full of stuff (we are storing belongings for my grandparents) that it could easily hide in there forever without us ever knowing. Ugh!

  19. stephanie / / Reply

    holy moley! Shovels are good for smooshing snakes.

  20. bdaiss / / Reply

    I wouldn’t call the zoo – I bet they get called all the time and will just sigh and tell you to deal with it. (At least that’s what our local reptile “zoo” does…) Animal control would likely be a better option. I agree with an earlier poster that if you don’t want a return of the snake, you’ll have to get rid of the yummy mice and any entry methods (which will also help stop the mice). Mothballs do nothing for snakes. A big squirt of water with a garden hose is a good way to get rid of them, but since your garage is full of stuff you’re storing, I’m guessing that’s not really possible. I’d second the find-a-teenage-boy-to-investigate option.

    I’m sure you know this already, but take solace in the fact that snakes do NOT like humans. He was probably just as freaked out as you were.

  21. Elaine / / Reply

    You poor thing! I share your pain! Do you live near water? There is a river at the bottom of my neighborhood. When a couple built a house near the rivet, they found a snake skin in their home but no snake! I didn’t know until this happened that snakes shed their skin! Not trying to scare you more than you already are…. Just an FYI to keep you on alert! Good luck!!!!!

  22. Lauren / / Reply

    I’d move, and leave everything behind. Find a climate that does not have those terrible creatures…

  23. beth cupitt / / Reply

    this horrific thing has happened to me a lot lately. i just moved to the country about 2 months ago and have been welcomed by many snakes (one a rattlesnake on our playground). so i asked all the farm peeps what to do. they recommend cats, guns, and guinea fowl. i actually hate cats and guns. well, i did. now i’m a regular cat lady. i went to the pound and brought home 3! and you can call me calamity jane now because i’ll be packing outside. cringe. apparently the guinea fowl alert you and even fight snakes. and they lay eggs. bonus.

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